Hindsight is a pain in the head. Literally. As an adult, you can look back on most things and think, “I gave it my all.” We take in all the evidence around us, weigh the outcomes and make our best decision. Should I have that extra doughnut? I’ll be working twice as hard in the gym this week. My cholesterol really could stand to not have it. It’ll make my fingers sticky. On the other hand, someone worked really hard on making that doughnut for me. There are starving people around the world that would love a doughnut. It tastes delicious. And, I love licking the sugar off my sticky fingers.
Then after you’ve savored the deliciousness of the doughnut, depending on how many days you have invested in your latest diet, you immediately regret the decision. In hindsight, maybe it wasn’t the best decision. Maybe if I would have known how bad I would feel, I would have changed my decision? Probably not. Regret has nothing to do with this post, I just thought about a doughnut and now I want one. Hindsight is what I’m getting at. In less than a month, I’ll be turning 30. So I’d like to use this post to list a few things about my 20s that I wish I would have figured out before hand.
3. You only START dreams in your 20s.
On my 20th birthday, I swore I was going to change the world, my world, with what I was about to do, and in less than 5 years, I would be done working hard for anything. It would have all just… happened. Then year 25 came and went and I was just getting started on trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. I’m not saying it’s impossible. There are dream stories out there. But what I’ve come to realize is that patience and reality were very hard to come by in your twenties. All those classes, all the parties, all of the breakups, all of the ideas, they all started the foundation of what lead me to where I am today. Let’s just say that with 30 days left in my 20s, I honestly feel that I’m still getting started. Just getting started on this next chapter…
2. Stop comparing.
It’s a scientific truth that we all naturally try and follow the crowd. If a group of people decide on one thing or another, it’s our natural instinct to feel as though the majority answer is the correct answer. So, naturally, I would find myself comparing accomplishments and ideals. This should have been the moment to break out of the shell. To take one step out of bounds and then ignore the whistle. Be unique. The cool thing about being unique in your 30s? You carry with you a sense of maturity, bigger risks and bigger failures. My 30s will be a time to be my own man and walk with a bigger stick, because no one really knew what the heck was going on and everyone now… Well they still don’t know what’s happening.
1. The world doesn’t care about me.
Now, looking back, the world never cared about what I wanted. It still doesn’t. Never was this more clear than when my son was born. That first week. (shivers). He was/is our world. And our world couldn’t care less if we had 2 hours of sleep, no real food and no human contact in days. It was a perfect metaphor for how the world didn’t care for my self-righteous, film student attitude. “Oh, you spent hours editing this piece? Yea, here’s a big dirty diaper and some pee to the face. Great job.” Boy, if I had only known at 20 how big of an asshole the world was going to be, I maybe would have worn a little armor. But seriously, that’s what makes you great! How well you’re able to take the rejects the world throws at you and turn them around to boost your momentum. Momentum that will eventually lead you to make another mistake. And another. And another. Until finally you’re able to stand on all of those mistakes and see the horizon again.
With that being said, my 20s have just been one big ass, glazed doughnut. I lived it. I breathed it. And I came out shiny on the other side. Just a couple of pounds heavier. So with that, I bid a fond farewell to my 20s. What an epic journey they were. I had way more downs than ups. But with that, I leave this post with one more thing. It seriously isn’t the number of big things that happened in my 20s. It was all the little things that really shaped who I am and who I will be. So here’s now to my 30s. Let’s go make some mistakes and discover just what this new demographic feels like. I’m sure it still doesn’t care who I am, but I care, and that’s all that matters. I just hope my 30’s have sprinkles on top.
photo credit: http://www.stltoday.com/